A Portrait of Daniel

2012-02-14T00:00:00.000-08:00

The pocket knife belongs to Daniel.

DANIEL WE ALL LOVE YOU IMMENSELY

INSIDE A SNOWFLAKE

2012-01-05T12:54:00.000-08:00

A congregation of Christmas trees for Daniel.

2011-12-24T23:53:00.000-08:00

I found this Christmas rhyme that Daniel wrote.
My thoughts went to this boat that he gave to me.

Do they refer to each other?

Then it might be a ferry boat.

The fishing lines and the anchor were added later by me and a fisherman's young daughter.

2011-12-11T02:52:00.001-08:00

Sedd från en annan vinkel.

Vad föreställer hon och vad tänker hon på?

2011-12-10T01:47:00.001-08:00

Jon Carl Daniel döptes i Harplinge kyrka på Pingstaftonen 1974.

Dopfunten skars 1702 av Gustav Kihlman.

Dopfatet var ristat med tecken som till dels inte kunde tydas.

Det fatet har sedan dess försvunnit.

En liten kyrkklocka innehåller malm från dopfuntens fot.

Vasilis fotograferade den 23 augusti 2011.

2011-08-21T04:20:00.000-07:00

Daniel made these pictures when he was four years old, on the 9th and 10th of December 1978.

Are these cars heading somewhere

or just moving from here?

Are they standing quite still

waiting to start up at will?

If I could enter them all

I would wait for your call.

Then we will go for a ride

and you are the guide.

The mysteries.

2011-06-02T04:34:00.000-07:00

Heartsease grew out of the gravel on the grave this summer.

Mostly blue as the sky.

A few cloudy white.

One sun yellow.

2011-03-09T10:56:00.000-08:00

Jag älskar dig Daniel.
I made this portrait of Daniel and Chat.
The knitted suit and the shoes were gifts from Rome.

2011-02-14T01:07:00.000-08:00

I love you Daniel.

2010-12-25T15:12:00.001-08:00

Christmas trees for Daniel.

2010-12-11T04:44:00.000-08:00

In 1979 Lo created an ex libris based on a drawing Daniel had made.

2010-09-18T01:20:00.000-07:00

A small pomegranate tree attended Daniel's requiem a year ago.

Marian laid blessed sand on the coffin. We placed some of this sand on the soil of the tree.
Since then the tree has blossomed profusely and four fruits are now appearing.

2010-08-23T22:41:00.000-07:00

I took this photo for Daniel on my way back from Australia.
The Audi R8 at London Airport Jan 2009.
I never got around to showing him... but I think he would have liked it!

Tim Macmillan

2010-08-22T12:34:00.000-07:00

Today the first flower on this snowflake gardenia opened.
I picture myself attaching it to the lapel of his jacket.
The jacket which he had bought the last day I saw him.
He drove me to the railway station that evening last summer.
When we had embraced and I was about to go to my train he asked me to wait.
He had something to show me.
He opened the car trunk and put on a black cotton surplus jacket.
It had chevrons on the sleeves.
I told him that I liked it.
Did I also tell him – or am I just imagining – that I many years ago bought a similar jacket?
A jacket that made me feel more brave when I needed to.
I’m not sure that I told him anything about it.

A dream today:
I am digging in the garden for some reason.
I coincidentally unearth an old wristwatch of mine.
It’s wrapped up in earth and roots.
I must have lost it ages ago.
I hardly recognize it.
Did I ever have a watch with a black steel wristband?
I leave it on the ground and mother comes to see it.
Suddenly it emits a loud alarm signal.
I wake up.

2010-08-22T09:59:00.000-07:00

Daniel laughing

The spontaneous, but never unexpected laugh,

unconstrainedly short and lasting forever,

coming from the heart and turning into observations

about the way the cat jumps on the chair

or an audi turns around the corner.

Then the familiar long silence again.

Until the next natural burst of the short and indelible laugh,

of loving words that embrace life and smile at it.

Vasilis Papageorgiou

Halmstad, 22 August 2010

2010-08-19T10:38:00.000-07:00

Bye, bye, beautiful.

Kristina Espmark

2010-03-10T03:10:00.000-08:00

Gifts to Lo from Daniel: two cats and a penguin.
The black cat was made by Daniel.

Till Daniel

Att se den du älskar
skickligt och lugnt närma sig
och ledigt bli lika bra som du i bordtennis,
och småningom bättre och bättre
för att oväntat snart lämna dig
långt bakom sig.

From Vasilis on Daniel’s birthday on the 10th of March 2010.

2010-02-13T23:36:00.000-08:00

Two Valentine cards made by Daniel.
It's possible to read the post stamp on the card on the top. It was sent from Lund on the 11th of February 1987.
If there was an envelope for the folding card it is now lost. Maybe it was delivered personally. Anyhow the time and place are unknown.
For Valentine's Day this year Lo made her own copy of the folding card with a heart cut out in silk paper revealing the red colour underneath. It was easy.

2009-12-26T12:32:00.000-08:00

Mazzy Star – Fade Into You

This song is from the album So Tonight That I Might See which was one of two albums Daniel left in the computer that he emptied in order to give it to his mother when he received a newer MacBook by Vasilis. Daniel recorded this album on tape for his sister some years ago. Mazzy Star was the favourite music of Daniel and his girlfriend Maria Patomella during their time together (1996 – 1999). When they parted Daniel gave Maria this record.

The photograph is taken in Stockholm by Vasilis the 8th of June 2009 at 1:48 pm. It shows Daniel (with his birthmark, naevus flammeus, on his cheek) driving one of his Audis at Stallgatan as they pass by one of the two bronze horses at Blasieholmstorg (the two horses are copies of two of the four Horses of Saint Mark).

The first make-believe identity taken by Daniel as a child was that of a horse. He called himself hästen (the horse).

The 23rd of August 2009 his sister Lo, unaware of Daniel's suicide the same day, bought this small plaque with a silver horse on it that can look sad or glad or mischievous depending on which angle you look at it.
The plaque now hangs above the entrance to Daniel's house at Stiernås outside Östersund.

2009-12-25T02:14:00.000-08:00

Christmas with Daniel
A link to last year

Pancho made the film
Note that Daniel asks Hamnar det här på YouTube sen eller? (Will this be on YouTube later or?)
and Pancho answers Jajamän det är bara att räkna med (Yeah just count on that).

2009-12-24T01:25:00.000-08:00

As a child Daniel loved the Christmas tree.

He never allowed his parents to discard it and for months the tree stood needle-less on the balcony.

Six years old Daniel spent a Christmas in the mountain cabin with his mother and his sister.

He refused to come with them to find a Christmas tree. They went alone and came back with a beautiful tree.

Daniel was extremely upset and sawed off the top.

He did not explain it himself but his sister now believes that the root of his distress was the fact that his family was not all gathered that Christmas.

The tree on the Land Rover is only the upper fourth of a huge fir tree that was taken down to open up the view from Sagatun, the home of Daniel's sister Lo and her husband Pancho.

When the tree fell to the ground the very top broke and has been tied back on with rope.

Daniel was given the alias Snöflingan (Snowflake) in Riksgränsen. He continued to on occasion be called and to call himself by that name.

I stand corrected.

The Christmas tree seems to have been of importance to Daniel longer than I knew.

He acquired this small man-made tree in his teens.

He placed it on a shelf over the headboard of his bed.

It was originally equipped with tiny electric bulbs.

They eventually broke down and were replaced by our mother with wooden apples.

When she once removed the tree, probably in spring-time, Daniel immediately asked to get it back.

2009-12-11T05:32:00.000-08:00

DANIEL

His name was chosen as a tribute to a line of his ancestors with that name and to the biblical Daniel.

The name Daniel means God is my judge.

Daniel's mother used to recite an old saying to him on his name day the eleventh of December:

Daniel profet inleder den tid då djur och människor bör leva i frid

Silos Apocalypse. Author: Beatus of Liebana. Illustrator: Petrus. Production: Spain (Silos), 1109.

(©The British Library)

2009-12-07T02:16:00.000-08:00

Filmed by showmewrong and np02058 at

Arvikafestivalen 090703
Daniel was there

(He told me, his sister Lo, that he was not so impressed by DM this time. I don't know why.)

Daniel sent this photo of his collection of Depeche Mode records to Vasilis.

2009-12-06T14:06:00.000-08:00

Document. 30th of April 2007, 9:10:46 pm at Sagatun (near Narvik, Norway).
From left: Pancho, Michael and Daniel. Lo holds the camera.

2009-12-06T13:40:00.000-08:00

Daniel's iPhone

2009-12-06T10:19:00.001-08:00

Detections of Daniel on the Internet

Photo of Daniel and his puppy Valter (?) on mirreochdina.blogg.se/

Parts of Daniel's collection of Audi model cars on the wall.

http://mirreochdina.blogg.se/(...24+25 augusti,17 september, 4 november 2009...)

http://lifeofmarrre.blogspot.com/ (...16+17+21+22 september 2009...)

OOOO

2009-12-01T02:38:00.000-08:00

Miss you mate!
Tim Macmillan

Daniel and his dogs in kungsträdgården

Lollipop festivalen Daniel and Tim

Daniel high flying

2009-10-23T03:25:00.000-07:00

Daniel's grave with first snow

63°10'27N 14°40'01E
Gravplats 129
Östra Begravningsplatsen
Östersund

Daniel's remaining desktop

Daniel took the self portraits on the desktop with Photo Boot a week before his suicide.

2009-10-07T07:22:00.000-07:00

Daniel på snowboard i Narvik maj 2007

Daniels bror Michael fotograferade

2009-10-01T06:29:00.000-07:00

Skogskapellet

Stockholm

Gravplats 129

Östra Begravningsplatsen

Östersund

2009-09-30T12:01:00.000-07:00

MUSIK SOM SPELADES VID REQUIEM FÖR DANIEL

Skogskapellet 17 september 2009

Enjoy the Silence Depeche Mode

Requiem: I. Introït. Requiem Eternam Dona Eis Domine Ensemble Organum & Marcel Pérès Composer: Johannes Ockeghem

Requiem: VIII. Praefatio

Requiem: IX. Sanctus (Antonius Divitis)

Let Me Be Your Armor assemblage 23 (Addendum)

Sea Of Stars Code 64 (Departure)

document assemblage 23 (Defiance)

Standing (Original) VNV Nation (Standing / Burning Empires)

Lullaby Assemblage 23 (Defiance)

Requiem: II. Kyrie

Requiem: X. Agnus Dei (plain-chant)

2009-09-19T20:08:00.000-07:00

17 september 2009

Hej! Tack för en väldigt fin men väldigt sorglig dag, den här dikten av Pär Lagerkvist läste jag när Daniel gått bort. Många av hans dikter stämmer in på Daniel. Ni får gärna lägga upp den på aportraitofdaniel-sidan.
Kram från
Kristina Cedrins

Arkitekt SAR/MSA

Ingen hand är så tom som min,

intet hjärta så öde.

Trädde någon i mina gårdar in,

han trodde sig stå bland de döde.

Ensam går jag på en förtorkad mark,

längtar bort från mitt hjärta.

Ingen storm blåser tung och stark,

liten och tom är min smärta.

Vissna örter stå vid min fot,

ljumma vindar mig följa.

Intet rusar mitt bröst emot

med hög och skälvande bölja.

Var afton jag lutar mitt huvud trött

mot trädens kraftlösa stammar.

Alla mina vägar har jag förnött,

deras stoft över örterna dammar.

En gång skall jag lämna den mark mig livet gav,

lämna de öde gårdar.

En längtan till dödens dånande hav

jag djupt i mitt hjärta vårdar.

2009-09-09T07:37:00.000-07:00

Daniels gedigna och samtidigt lediga godhet, vänlighet och skarpsinne som skapar hans underbara närvaro.

Vasilis Papageorgiou

2009-09-09T07:02:00.001-07:00

This site no longer exists –

http://daniel.audivorsprung.com/
– and we shall try to re-create as much as we can at
http://daniel-audivorsprung.blogspot.com/

The key to Claudia

2009-09-08T14:15:00.000-07:00

Our beloved Daniel wished to die.
His traces are now so conspicuous.
He has our closest attention.
Daniel Come Here

Collecting all relevant information,
exploring the depths of every memory
to reach a satisfactory interpretation
that would hopefully gain his approval.

Daniel Come Here